First Day Of My Life

Iris Kathleen - September 4, 2011

It's been one month since our daughter was born and I'm still trying to grasp that she's here, so alive, breath taking, and completely her own little person. 

The day before her birth I woke up early and spent the whole day cooking meals to freeze and have later for when she arrived (presumably the following week or later). Zack and I went to Chilis for dinner with his parents and I felt completely normal and happy as I ate my greasy chicken crispers and watched the football games they had playing. When I went to bed that night I thought of what I would do the next day: mop, vacuum, finish the laundry. I woke up about 2:00am as Zack came through the bedroom door, "I got up to take Tylenol PM because for some reason I can't sleep," he said sounding almost concerned. We both dozed off shortly after that but about thirty minutes later I woke up again feeling what I thought might be a very mild contraction. I brushed the feeling off thinking it would go away. But it didn't. And the feeling of what I "thought" might be contractions started getting closer together. So I got up around 4:00am and took a shower. I went downstairs with three objects: a pen and paper to track my contractions and tweezers to pluck my eyebrows in the meantime. I sat down and another contraction started so I wrote down the time and duration. As I was plucking my eyebrows the next one came on but before I could write down the time my water broke!

As you can imagine, I was shocked. I wasn't even sure if what I was feeling were real contractions. A sudden rush of anxiety ran over me as I realized what was happening: It was show time but we were still a good hour away from the hospital; And my water just broke which meant pain was about to arrive. I yelled upstairs to Zack but he was asleep. I ran upstairs, opened the door and proclaimed, "Babe, my water just broke!" Before he opened his eyes he jumped out of bed, turned on the light, grabbed the bags for the hospital, and said, "Call the doctor" all in one fluid motion.

We were the only car on the highway since it was 5:30am on a Sunday morning. The contractions were  progressively getting more intense and closer together. I mean really close together. I looked over at Zack, "Are you okay? Are you worried we won't make it because my contractions are so close? Are you sure you're okay to drive since you took Tylenol PM?" He stayed calm and reassured me, "Everything is going to be fine." And then chuckled, "and believe me, the Tylenol PM has no affect now, I'm very awake." I replayed what we learned in our birth classes: relax muscles and breathe through each contraction, but instead gripped the handle above the passenger window as I wiggled around until each one passed. Zack tried to talk me through them by reminding me to breathe then finally said, "Be honest, don't you just want to punch our birthing coach lady in the face right now?" And I did. She was wrong about two things. 1- it's impossible to relax through contractions, and 2- just because it's your first baby doesn't mean you have "plenty of time" to get to the hospital.

We got to the hospital just in time. As they were about to administer the epidural they asked me if I even wanted it because it was time to push. I did. 

At 7:46am I heard the sweetest little whimper of a cry. She was here. A week early. Only 5 total hours of labor. I couldn't help but feel that she was almost as excited about her life as I was. Its as if she has a purpose and is wasting no time.

Iris Kathleen - 1 month

It's been 1 month since that day. Though this past month has flown by, it feels like she's always been here. And in a way I guess she has. She has so much of her Daddy in her from the way she looks to her disposition. She's a very special girl and I've felt this from the beginning. She is a quiet learner, always observing her surroundings. She only cries when she needs something. And my favorite thing of all: she loves to cuddle and be shown affection. Every day she gets cuter, smarter, funnier, and more beautiful. She is the embodiment of goodness and truth. A perfect definition of love.